Holiday Observing – While Observing the Holi-daze


NATIONAL LAMPOON’S CHRISTMAS VACATION, Chevy Chase, 1989

This time of year can live in and be approached with many kinds of attitudes.

Fear

Pain

Joy

Excitement

Anxiety

Anticipation

Sadness

You get to decide.  You may think you don’t, you may think you must be bombarded, forced to feel, forced to participate.  But none of that is true.  You can CHOOSE any experience you want.  So decide right now WHAT you wish to feel this holiday season.  And fill in the blank..

THIS HOLIDAY SEASON I CHOOSE TO FEEL ____________________.

Noone else needs to know your choice, but remember, if you choose to approach the Holidays in a negative way, you will receive Negative results.

You can even choose NOT to participate at all.  Some people would scoff at this, saying the expectation of others prevent you having having a choice.  NOPE. (Buzzer sound). Wrong again.  Give yourself permission to participate, or not to any level you wish.  OWN that.  Say YES when it feels right to and say NO when it feels wrong, or exhausting, or draining.  If you do not follow this strategy you are STILL MAKING A CHOICE.  It will be a choice that makes you FEEL like a victim and therefore you will be choosing to be victimized.  Doesn’t that mean there has to be someone outside of ourselves that is attacking or taking from us?  Maybe, but who invited them to behave that way towards us?  WE did, in gold lamenated hand script invitation card.

So How will you CHOOSE to show up this holiday season?  Decide now, cause the clocks ticking, you will show up playing some role, what will it be?

I have had many Christmases, some where I decided I would feel bad about not buying the right/enough/expensive/size/shape/colour gift.  Or where I may have decided to feel sad about what I didn’t have/get.  Or where I may have decided to feel angry at someone/thing/place/situation.  Or even decided to feel bad about not have done/said enough.  Maybe I didn’t bake?  Maybe I didn’t write cards?  Maybe I didn’t go to an event?

But I have had other years when I have realized that any day not just holiday is what you make it!  This year I was in a new home, where I was hosting, couldn’t find everything I needed, was not home to clean or buy groceries ahead of time and had to lean heavily on loved ones.  And guess what.  IT TURNED OUT GREAT!  Don’t get me wrong there were moments where I saw a shadow lurking of what could have been, frustration, or judgement of self, or anger, but I realized when I looked around, we were together.  WE were healthy (and we have had many when we weren’t) and we were all present genuinely and happily aware of being surrounded by those we love.

When we allow our selves to get beyond living in our dramatic stage in our heads, getting out of judgement and simply observe, we often miss being triggered to anger, triggered to sadness and triggered to pain.  We observe, question and release the ideas that really don’t resonate with what we have truly decided we wanted to bring to the holi-daze, and every day of our lives.

Some might state, What about people who are alone?  I ask why would they choose to be alone?  If they do not celebrate Christmas, then that day would be no different then any other, and therefore, typical, and self chosen.  If they do celebrate Christmas then that day would be no different then any other, and therefore, typical, and self chosen.What does that mean?  If you choose every day to be alone I ask why you would chose isolation?  The best way to pull yourself out of your own funk and loneliness is to give to OTHERS, which would then provide you with OTHERS to celebrate with!  Anyone can feel lonely even in a room full of people.  If you are alone, reach out, assist, look for opportunities to give to the community to those other lonely people out there.  You need not FEEL alone, if you CHOOSE not to.  And if you are simply stuck, and do not know HOW to not be alone, I encourage you to start with being in service to others.  In doing so you create a community of like minded ‘Givers’ especially at a time of year when authentically giving is sadly strained.

If all else fails and this Blogg leaves you FEELING confused, I encourage you to reach out to me, I will clarify, and provide deeper insight to my tongue and cheek approach to my Holi-Daze banter!

Merry Christmas, Happy Holi-Daze and Happy New Year in any way YOU CHOOSE!

xo

E

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *